I tell my daughters on a regular basis that I feel blessed to be their dad. I usually take great delight in watching them live their lives. There are days that it is more difficult than others because of the struggles they sometimes have. I hate watching them struggle. Like most parents I want so much to provide a great life for them - financially, spiritually, and emotionally. I love my kids so much and want to be included in what they are doing. However, more and more they have friends that they spend time with that I don't really know that well. They spend their days in chat and email conversations that I don't know about. I invite them regularly to share with me or to do things with me, but more and more they have other things to do. Today I took the girls out to buy them school supplies. We ate dinner together. We went shopping. We didn't buy all they needed and spent close to $400. When we got home, one daughter left to go to a friend's house and one went to her room to make plans for tomorrow that will no likely involve me driving her somewhere without asking me what my day is like. No "thank yous". No acknowledgement of our time together. I feel like I keep giving and they just keep taking. Maybe this is parenting or maybe I am doing it wrong, but sometimes parenting just seems like a lonely job.
(I know, these are the rambling writings of a person on a little depression. It happens sometimes. It will pass.)
P.S. Four days later - Life is good and kids are great. I had a little melt down, but it passed.
2 comments:
I thought about your post several times throughout that day - it made me reflect on how God might feel when I fail to thank Him or don't choose to spend time with Him, not intentionally but simply because I'm more focused on myself. Thanks for sharing.
I have had these same thoughts, Mel. It has been quite humbling for me. Thanks for reading my blog and for your thoughtful reflections.
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