Thursday, October 6, 2011

Adam & Eve - Part 1

For some reason, there has been a great deal of talkrecently about biblical story of Adam and Eve.  Many people I know have asserted that to be a “true Christian” one must believe in a literal man, Adam, and literal woman, Eve.  This admonition seems to be aimed at trying to maintain the view that the biblical view of the creation of the world is complete and historically accurate as it is written.  Those that hold this view seem to  look to the accounts in Genesis as a history of the world and suggest that the stories there be held as factual accounts of creation without any attempt to interact or dialogue with the evidence for an earth that is millions of years old, the existence of dinosaurs, or the development of the human person over time as evidenced by fossil records, etc.  I am a self-admitted skeptic of things of faith and like Jesus’ disciple, Thomas, I want some proof for things; “Because the Bible says it” has not been an adequate explanation for me since I was in the 6th grade.  I want to believe (and there are many things I try to accept on faith), but faith does not come as easily to me as others. 

That being said, it is not that I do not believe in an actual Adam and Eve, it is just that I don’t know.  I am not willing to stake my faith on their literal existence and I am not willing to judge others on their belief (or disbelief) in the existence of a literal Adam and Eve.  To me, the insistence on a literal Adam and Eve as a litmus test for faith creates many problems.  First of all, it creates divisions in the followers of the faith based on that which cannot be known with certainty and something that is not a fundamental of the faith.  The stance lacks grace and humility and it does not focus on the message and meaning of the creation story for the generations.   Just because I do not know for certain if Adam and Eve truly existed does not mean that there is not value in the biblical story.  To focus on one seems to diminish the other.

As I learned through the years, the creation story was not necessarily written to tell us HOW the earth was created, but by whom it was created and why it was created.  For me it is the story of humanity – both as a whole and as individuals.  To simply say that the story of Adam and Eve is the story of the fall of humanity is to miss a greater truth about what that might mean.  

Despite Dr. Mohler's (and others') argument, one of the reasons I believe that the story of Adam and Eve can be seen as story of humanity is because their names, Adam and Eve, literally mean “Man” and “Woman”.  In this I see that their story is our story and the story of every person.  It is the story of our personal history and the story of our corporate history.  This truth for me does not change if Adam and Eve are literal people or not.  They may have been literal people whose story speaks to all through the generations.  If, by chance they are not literal people, their story still speaks to something very real about our experience.  I appreciate the attempt to make sure that all parts of the biblical record fit together, but I do not accept that IF one part of the Bible is written as a metaphor, then the entirety of faith must crumble.  The of the faith would  then seem to be in the power of the metaphor to speak to generation after generation.  

See Part 2 for reflections on the meaning of the story for humanity.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Counseling, Psychotherapy, and Pastoral Counseling

I have been a part of several conversations recently that involved questions about the perceived difference between counseling, psychotherapy, and pastoral counseling.  There are volumes and volumes written on each of these things and the differences between them.  I don't know that I have a great deal to add, but I would like to offer my general reflections.  In common usage, counseling and therapy are used interchangeably.  However, technically there is a difference.

Many occupations and disciplines use the concept of "counseling".  For the most part, counseling does involve listening to a person and helping them with some decision, skill, or problem.  For the most part, counseling involves less in-dept responses.  Counseling involves applying a particular body of knowledge to a particular problem.  Counseling is more technique-driven and would be more instructional.

Psychotherapy also involves listening to a persons problems and does operate from a particular base of knowledge, but is generally more focused on insight.  A psychotherapist is going help a client reflect on various aspects of his or her life that might provide insight into the person's current complaints or struggles.  Which aspects of life become the focus of conversation will usually be driven both by the person's presenting issues and the theoretically orientation of the therapist.

In Tennessee, Pastoral Counselors can be licensed.  Those who are licensed are called Clinical Pastoral Therapists.  These therapists or those who are certified by the American Association of Pastoral Counselors are a special type of psychotherapists that use the spiritual resources of faith in their understanding of their clients.   There are numerous books written on pastoral counseling and what makes it unique -- each with its own twist - and each is often quite deep and theoretical.  This is why pastoral counselors often have difficulty articulating what it is that they do that is different from other therapists.  Below is my latest attempt to summarize what we do.  Even in reading this, there are questions about what this theory actually means in practice, but it is an attempt to capture it.  The statement below was recently written for a congregation in Nashville to help them better understand the work of the Pastoral Counseling Centers of Tennessee.



The question about what makes the counseling at the Pastoral Counseling Centers of Tennessee (PCCT) unique is a common one.  The short answer to the question involves some version of the fact that our counselors have a theological education and we offer financial assistance with our fees. The identity of our therapists as representatives of various faith groups is part of our identity; however, exactly what that means is more complex.   The training and experience of our therapists means that they attempt to understand their clients and do therapy with them in a way that is different than the counseling or therapy offered at other places.

In a world where diagnostic labels abound and managed care dictates modality of treatment, length of treatment, and frequency of treatment, PCCT offers something more personal.  We are capable of using the common diagnostic labels of our mental health peers, but we intentionally seek to see each person beyond those labels and understand the richness of each person’s life and how the various components of a person’s life interact to influence their faith, mental status, emotions, and relationships.  This holistic approach to therapy seeks to understand the underlying issues of a person’s presenting problems.  This approach to therapy requires attention to the development of a relationship that goes beyond the application of a particular technique.  This approach to therapy attempts to see each person in the fullness of what they were created to be and help them identify and overcome obstacles to living into that potential. We often refer to this as “Seeking to embody God’s healing presence.”  In the process of relationship, we use the tools that other qualified psychotherapists might use, but we also can call our training in theology, scripture, church history and the traditions of our faith when they might be helpful.  Our goal is to sit with clients as they sort out their struggles and make meaning of their lives.  We do not rush to answer the difficult questions for them and we do not leave them alone and lost. 

The style of therapy that we foster and promote has proven again and again to be healing and meaningful for our clients.  We believe it is the most excellent care.  We are committed to the idea that God does not just love those or offer healing to those with financial means, but God reaches out to all people.  For this reason, we seek to offer our services with financial assistance for those that cannot afford our regular fee.  We want to make our style of therapy available to anyone who wants it.  Because we want to represent the faith traditions in which we were nurtured and the community of faith as a whole, it is part of our identity and mission that we be intimately connected to local congregations.  Our offices are all located in space provided by local congregations.  We seek to offer training and other benefits to local clergy and the congregants they represent.  We are grateful to each individual and each congregation that supports us through their prayers and through their financial gifts.  Through this support we are able to bring God’s healing to the community of Middle Tennessee.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Why Can't We All Just Get Along?

I know it is a cliché question that really seems laughable, but I really don’t understand the level of divisiveness that seems to have permeated our society, our politics, and our churches.   I understand that people feel strongly about what they believe and they don’t want to compromise their beliefs.  The problem I see is that people think that if they try to understand another’s ideas or beliefs that they will somehow lose something of themselves.  The reality that I have experienced is that when I more fully understand another’s beliefs or ideas I gain something for myself.  I either come away with a better understanding of why I believe what I do or I come away with something that alters or enhances my beliefs.  I do not come away feeling like I have lost anything.  I have also found that when I enter into conversations with others with whom I differ, but who are willing to be open, I gain relationship.  When we close ourselves off to interactions with others, we only gain loneliness.  When we insist that others must be like us or be against us, we walk a path to division and shallow connection. 

I am so weary of people who interrogate others and question their integrity simply because they hold different ideas.  If a person is so sure of what they believe, why should they fear what others have to say?  I am also saddened by those that when they encounter another’s idea, their first response is to look for how the other is wrong or different rather than looking for places of commonality.  Jesus gave his followers the COMMANDMENT to Love one another just as he has loved us (John 15:12).  He also instructed us to love our enemies (Matthew 5:44).  If we are looking for ways to ostracize others and if we are referring to the world in terms of “Us” and “Them”, then we are not seeking to build community and love.  If we remove the “Us” and “Them” thinking, then we are only left with “Us”.  If I approach another with the attitude of, “I am not sure what to do with my thoughts and feelings, but I am committed to figure out how to live well with you and love you” that seems very different than, “You are not like me, therefore you must be bad and wrong.  I can’t associate with you and must do what I can to discredit you.”  

 Too often the public interactions of our leaders seem more motivated by the preservation of power, than finding a common good.  There is more talking than listening going on.  In order to build community, we need to learn to listen.  We have to realize that true power is accomplishing something great together, not in defeating the one another.  As long as people are afraid of losing their power or are afraid of losing…period, then they will act as if all interactions are competitions.  I know some of my worst moments have been motivated by anxiety.  However, the Bible is clear that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of love (2 Timothy 1:7).  In fact we also read that perfect love casts out fear (I John 4:17-19).  Jesus’ most harsh words were for those that used their power to take advantage of others and those who thought themselves better than others.  Likewise, Jesus’ most compassionate words were for those who were vulnerable and repentant.  I continue to pray that the love of God would overcome the hatred and fear that divides us.  May the people of God demonstrate God’s love to one another and to the world.      

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Surely the Lord Is In This Place...And I Didn't Know It.


The story of Jacob in the reading this morning begins with verse 10 of chapter 28 of Genesis and says that “Jacob left Beer-sheba and went toward Haran”.  Jacob didn’t just wake up one day and say, “Hey, I wonder what’s happening in Haran tonight.”  We have to go back a few verses into chapter 27 to see that Jacob was leaving one of the most dysfunctional families in the history of the world!  Jacob had conspired with his mother to steal his brother, Esau’s, blessing from their blind father.  Esau had threatened to kill Jacob and their mother learned of this. So, she convinced her husband that the women in the area where they lived were not really good “wife material” and suggested that he send Jacob to another land to marry a woman there (one of his cousins I might add.)  When his brother heard that his father “didn’t like the women in the area that they lived,” even though he was already married, he went out and got another wife from another country just so his brother would not be one up on him.  This family’s story is full of jealousy, deception, manipulation, competition, anger and hatred…and THIS is the family that God chooses to make His covenant with!  We should all feel like maybe there is just a bit of hope for us in our relationship with God at this point!
When Jacob deceives his father into giving him the blessing that should have gone to the first-born son, his father is trying to determine if the person in front of him really is his first-born son, Esau, and he asked a question about how the son was able to bring him a meal of wild game so quickly.  Jacob, who was pretending to be Esau, said, “Because the Lord, YOUR God granted me success” in my hunting (Gen. 27:20).  It seems important to note that in that moment, Jacob does not claim his father’s God as his own.  By the use of the word, “Your”, Jacob distances himself from God.  For those of us who grew up with religious parents, there seems to be a time when we began to question the reasons for the faith that our parents professed.  As a parent of teenagers, I have had the experience of listening to my children as they question the God that we have worshipped as a family. 
Jacob’s family was also full of difficulty and struggle.  There are times when events in our lives cause us to question the God that we have grown up with.  There are times when our difficulty and struggle may cause us to question even God’s existence.  There may be times that we don’t know how to reconcile the world around us with the God we thought we knew.  God becomes YOUR God or THEIR God.  It is another’s God, but we are not sure what God is to us.  It seems that it is in this kind of state of mind in which Jacob leaves his house and heads out to his uncle’s house in Haran.  This where our reading picks up this morning.
Jacob is traveling by himself towards Haran.  As he travels, he has time to think.  He could be reflecting where he is going and wondering what he will encounter or who he will encounter.  He could be reflecting on where he has been.  He may have thought about his brother and his brother’s threats to kill him.  He may have thought about his own actions in deceiving his father with the help of his mother.  Maybe he felt guilty…or maybe he didn’t.  Either way, he was out in the middle of nowhere and all alone.
As he reached the end of the day, he settled in a place called Luz for the evening.  He apparently had no tent or such supplies and simply lies down with his head on a rock.  The vision that Jacob has is of, what is called, a ladder between earth and heaven.  It could be a stairway or a ramp, but it is some connection on which angels are ascending and descending between earth and heaven.  The movement of the angels signifies the fact that God is aware of the things of earth and God interacts with the world.  The angels take reports and messages up and the angels bring the words and actions of God down.  So, it very much could be that Jacob is confronted with his own actions.  God certainly demonstrates full knowledge of who Jacob is as he offers to continue the covenant with Jacob that He began with Jacob’s grandfather, Abraham.
Jacob awakens from his dream and I just love what he says.  He says, “Surely the Lord is in this place – and I did not know it!”  Jacob had never really known his father’s God and what he did know seemed to be tied with his family and his father.  Jacob had left his family and perhaps believed that he had left his family’s God too.  In this strange place, away from his family, and all alone…Jacob met God.  Just like there are those times when we find ourselves questioning God, I hope that there have also been those moments when you find God in the most unexpected places.  Sometimes we experience God when we are all alone and pondering our life, but we may also find God on a hike in the woods or walk on the beach.  We may experience God in a concert hall as a gifted performer demonstrates mastery of her instrument.  We may experience God in a coffee shop or restaurant in the presence of a friend with whom we find connection and acceptance.  Sometimes we experience God in a regular moment that is suddenly transformed into a holy moment and we realize, “Surely, the Lord is in this place and I did not know it.”
It is possible that we could even be surprised in this place.  Though it is place of God, we sometimes come here with other things on our mind.  We come here thinking we know what to expect.  It is possible that we might just take for granted the words from the texts and the communion of the saints.  Maybe, just maybe, there are times when we experience God here in ways that we have not before and we say, “Surely the Lord is in this place and I didn’t know it.”
When we have those moments, we should do what Jacob does.  We should do something to remember that moment and that place.  Jacob renamed Luz and called it “Beth-el”.  El is one of the names of God and Beth-El means “House of God”. It was Jacob’s way of noting that he encountered God there. 
 My wife has several containers of Shells and sand that are in various places in our house.  They are there to remind her of the many trips we have taken to the beach.  It has almost become a family cliché for us, but when we are at the beach…at some time while we are there…my wife will say, “I think God lives at the beach.”  For her, the beach is a “Beth-el”.  The sand and the seashells in our house are not traditional religious symbols, anymore than the rocks that Jacob used, but they are a reminder that “God is in this place.”

What is your “Beth-El?”  Do you have one?  What reminds you of the moment or moments when you experience God?  Has there been a time when your language changed from “Your God” or “Their God” to “MY God.”  Have you had a moment in your life where you have felt close to God, but it wasn’t a place you expect to find God?  Or have you ever been surprised to actually find God in place where you took God’s presence for granted?  I love those moments in my life when I can say, “Surely the Lord is in this place…and I didn’t know it.”  I pray you have you have such moments in your life.  Amen.



Sunday, July 10, 2011

There's Why We're Here and Then There's Something Else

At First Baptist Church, Nashville, our Pastor’s family has been dealing with some personal issues; issues he has shared with thechurch.  These issues have led to “Pastor Frank” taking several weeks off from the church.  This morning another “Pastor Frank” filled in for our pastor.  With the National Assembly of the Christian Church, Disciples of Christ in Nashville this week, Rev. Dr. Frank Thomas of the Mississippi Boulevard Christian Church in Memphis filled our pulpit.  As he began his sermon, he said, “I realized I may have been called here for one purpose, but maybe I am here for another.”  After that, he led the congregation in a beautiful time of prayer for our pastor and his family.  Dr. Thomas indicated that his family had also struggled and he felt led to support the pastor and our congregation in this way.  After the time of prayer, Dr. Thomas brought us a most thought-provoking and moving message around the servanthood of Jesus that centered around the “Basin, the water pitcher, and the towel” that Jesus used to wash the disciples feet.

The beauty of the servanthood message was that it was presented with an act of servanthood.  There were at least two thoughts that immediately came to mind.  First of all, the word preached is never as meaningful (or meaningful at all) without the act of service that communicates the authenticity of the message.  However, an act of service that is designed to solely “earn” the right to speak is hardly authentic.  A person who demonstrates genuine humility in service that comes from a place of transformation may have the right to speak of love, transformation, and servanthood as no other.  It seems rather trite to simply say that “faith without works is dead” when what we mean is that if our faith does not make a transformative difference in how we live our lives on a daily basis, it is completely lacking in any authentic significance.  Demonstrating care and compassion with humility surely must come before any explanation of WHY we might live such a life…if any such explanation is necessary.

The other thought that stays with me from the experience in worship today is that what we think we are supposed to be doing and what God thinks we are supposed to be doing may not be the same things.  However, instead of this becoming a source of stress as we try to figure out “the real truth” of things, we simply have to be open to seeing the opportunities before us and the willingness to act on them.  The prayer for the Pastor’s family was not in the program today, but it certainly did not feel like a waste of time by the time it was done.   I wonder how many times in my life, I have been frustrated by what I thought was an interruption or a distraction that, if I had been open to it, could have been an opportunity for blessing.   However, one of the things that I think about the ministry of Pastoral Care and counseling is that Pastoral Care givers often provide a time for reflection and care that is not on the agenda.  When someone has received bad news of some kind or is dealing with difficulty, so often there is an established way of “treating” the difficulty or “dealing with” the difficulty.  The Pastoral Caregiver, however, allows for a time-out from what is “supposed” to be happening to find out what is really happening.  The person who may be used by God does not get so bogged down in their role, duty, for function that they can’t shift gears when needed.  This morning, the “preacher” shifted gears.  He named the hurt out loud and took time to address it.  We need to be open to being used by God in just such ways.  Learning the patience of letting things be what they are, rather than trying to make them be what we think they should be is a challenge, but a path to great blessing.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

What Will They Say About You?


"Not that I have already obtained this or have already reached the goal; but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own.  Beloved, I do not consider that I have made it my own; but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus."        Philippians 3:12-14( NRSV)

Several years ago I attended the funeral of friend.  During the funeral several people from my friend’s life were able to share their reflections about the man that he was.  Each person knew my friend in a different area of his life – work, family, etc.  Without exception, each person described my friend in exactly the same way.  They talked about his kind heart, his religious faith, his friendship, and his sense of humor among other wonderful traits.  I was struck by the fact that it did not matter which part of his life was being talked about, he was described in exactly the same way.  I wondered if people in every area of my life would be able to do the same for me.  I wondered what I would need to change now so that when I die, people would be able to say those kinds of things about me.  This experience was just one in line of events that have shaped me in the last 15 years, but one that I return to in my thoughts again and again.

At the time of this event, I realized that I took some relationships for granted and tended to let my guard down a bit when I was with certain people.  I could be irritable or short with those people while I tried harder not to be with others.  During the last decade, I have sought to try to be the same person in every area of my life.  Those that know me know that can count on honest and direct feedback from me, but that I also try to demonstrate love and care in what I do.  The odd thing about seeking to live life this way is that I am very aware of every time that I fail.  Whether it is being impatient with one of kids or a stranger in traffic, I immediately know that I have fallen short of my ideal.  I know that I fall short because I constantly hold the ideal for myself.

Because my life has been so profoundly affected by experiences of the unconditional love of God, which has become the highest good for me; seeking to love God because of the love God has shown to me and seeking to love others as I have been loved.  Having an overarching goal for life means that when I encounter an event, encounter a person, or a problem, I try to figure out how to live out the goal in that moment.  Again, there are so many times that I fail, but I keep on trying.  Some that I know struggle because they set unrealistic goals for themselves or they get bogged down in self-criticism when they fail.  The beautiful thing about God’s grace is that it means that when we take a misstep, we can simply adjust our stride and just take our next step in the direction we want to go.  There are some missteps that have consequences that we must live with, but God walks with us through those and can help us learn from those if we are open to that. 

As the country song says, I want to live my life so “The preacher won’t have to lie when I die.”  I don’t want others to have to lie either.  I also want the satisfaction that I have done the best that I can.  Even though I fail every day, I never want to lose sight of where I want to be and where I want to go.  Don’t know what brought this to my mind today, but was reflecting on it this morning and just wanted to get it out.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Thinking about Sin

I have been attending Baptist churches since the day I was born. I have heard so many sermons that I can’t remember them all. Many of the sermons included some kind of formulation against living a sinful life. There have been attempts to define sin. There have been those who have graded sins and those that have rightly tried to level the playing field by recognizing that no sin is better or worse than another. The place that I become uncomfortable is when someone starts trying to list sins. They always have some verse from the Bible to back up whatever wrong-doing they are against today and they are convinced that God is on their side against that very thing. There are also those who reject any idea that sin is relative. They say things like, “If something is a ‘sin’ then it is a sin for all” or “Right is right and wrong is wrong.”

As a quick side note, I do find it interesting that ALL of the major world religions have some things in common that are considered “sin”. Even many non-religious people will say that something like “murder” is a sin. There seems to be something universal about one person taking the life of another that is particularly reprehensible. In broad terms, I think sin is something that interferes with our ability to be connected with God and others. Many or most Christians would say that any “sin” automatically alienates us from God. The problem is that so many people seem to have different lists of what is on that list and what is not. People have picked and chosen rules from the Levitical code of laws that suit them while rejecting others as culturally irrelevant. The problem is that different groups pick different sins.

For several years, I have been reflecting on the fact that Jesus summed up all of the law in two commandments that he called the greatest commandments. In Matthew 22: 36-40 Jesus quotes portions of Deuteronomy 6:5 and Leviticus 19:18 and says, “'YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.' "This is the great and foremost commandment.”The second is like it, 'YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.' "On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets." The entirety of my thoughts on this passage have been shared in lectures and workshops and will have their place some day. However, I will offer a summary.

The two most important things that a person can do are get their own relationship right with God and love others. Getting the relationship right with God is not about a one-time decision to accept Jesus’ gift of grace nor is it simply developing a list of things not to do so that God will be happy with you. Getting the relationship right with God is about acknowledging our own brokenness and failures, past and present, and acknowledging our own giftedness and potential. One helps us discover how to be involved in the world and the other helps us maintain humility with others. The part about loving others as yourself means that first we acknowledge the humanity of each person. We cannot simply see others as the divisive labels that we put on each other like Democrat, Republican, Christian, Jew, Black, White, Straight, Gay, Lost, or Saved, etc. Just because we know something about someone, does not mean that we know everything about someone. Each person is individual and each person is a…person with a story and feelings, and so on. If we are to love the other as ourselves, then we must want to hear the others’ story as much as we want others to hear ours. We must seek to understand others as much as we want to be understood. Beyond that, if we are to love others as we love ourselves, then we must help the other when they struggle with their brokenness and failures – not ridicule and attack. We must seek to help others discover the fullness of their potential and all that God created them to be.

Sin, for me, then becomes anything we do or think that denies our own brokenness and supposes superiority; it is the failure to acknowledge our own frailties and struggles. However, it is also whatever we do or think that keeps us from seeing the giftedness we have been given by God. When we treat ourselves like we don’t matter, we deny the God in whose image we are created. Likewise, sin against another is when take advantage of the vulnerability of the other or attack the frailty of the other. Sin against the other is denying the image of God that is in us all.

This can be stated in a positive in that we should seek to know ourselves fully, as God knows us. We should seek to see others as God sees them and to seek to embody the grace and love of God towards others. Too many times, sin is reduced to a list things we should not do, however, sin comes into full view for us when we set our hearts on offering love and grace to others; to treat them as fellow humans on the journey of life; and help them become all that they were created to be. How can we seek to harm another, take advantage of another, use another, or hate another when we are seeking to help them become all that God created them to be? And the same would be true of activities that affect us in our own relationship with God.

This reflection is why most sermons and lessons on “sin” seem so watered down and meaningless. When our purpose in life is more about relationships - with God and others – a simple list of do’s and don’ts seems so superficial.